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Teen Years (13-18)

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Passages: Teen Years

News & tips for mothers of kids age 13 to 18.

By Carol DausPublished: July, 2008

Girls vs. sexism

Nine out of 10 teen girls report experiencing sexual harassment, and a large percentage also say they have received discouraging comments about their abilities in school and athletics, according to a recent study of 600 girls between the ages of 12 and 18 from California and Georgia.
   
“Sexism remains pervasive in the lives of adolescent girls,” says Campbell Leaper, professor of psychology at UC Santa Cruz. “Our research suggests that parents, teachers and the media can help girls to learn about discrimination and recognize when it occurs.”


Changing driving laws

New legislation related to the use of wireless phones while driving went into effect July 1 in California.
   
The new laws differ for drivers, depending on their ages. Drivers under 18 cannot use cell phones at all and cannot send text messages (which nine of 10 young drivers in various polls say they do). Law enforcement can issue the teenager a primary violation if he or she is caught using a wireless device.
   
Drivers 18 and over will be allowed to use a hands-free device to talk on their wireless phone while driving. They are not banned from text messaging or from using PDA devices. However, a citation may be issued to a driver of any age if the driver was distracted and not operating the vehicle safely.
   
The law is stricter for younger drivers, because teen drivers are more likely than older drivers to be involved in crashes due to a lack of driving experience.
   
The Automobile Club of Southern California reports that car accidents are the leading cause of death for people ages 16 to 20.


Too much texting?
Techno talk causes teen social problems

Texting is nothing to “LOL” about, from a parent’s perspective. That’s because today’s teens are glued 24/7 to their cell phones, clicking away hastily as they carry on lengthy conversations with friends.
   
Most parents have a hard time understanding why their kids would rather text message a friend than pay a personal visit or use the telephone. But the fact remains that technology is completely integrated into how teens communicate. They start their days “IM’ing” friends or checking to see who’s online. Later in the day, they spend hours texting friends on their cell phones, with some teens sending over 5,000 text messages a month.
   
“Even when they’re not on their cell phones or test messaging, the devices are on and kids are distracted by them,” says Dr. Michael Osit, a clinical psychologist and author of “Generation Text: Raising Well-Adjusted Kids in an Age of Instant Everything.” (AMACOM Books, 2008).
   
Osit points out that inter-machine interaction plays a huge role in the social development of techno-oriented kids. This can be harmful because children don’t automatically understand social skills – they have to practice them. “In normal situations, there is a progression in a relationship that has natural, appropriate boundaries, but what I find is when kids text excessively, those boundaries are dismantled prematurely,” he says. “They become too intimate and too close, and they say things they normally wouldn’t say in person.”
   
Another problem with texting is that parents are not privy to the communication that takes place. In the old days, parents were able to observe and teach their children about what was appropriate and inappropriate in relationships, which is not the case in today’s private world of technology.
   
When excessive texting becomes a substitute for face-to-face and voice-to-voice interaction, it can stunt communication skills, because there is a lack of nonverbal signs and signals – which are just as important as words. “About 60 percent of a message is nonverbal, so teens dependent on texting lose out on how to truly communicate with people,” says Osit.
   
Bullying is also a problem, as many teens send mass messages via e-mail or their cell phones. “The invisibility of techno talk can be perilous in many cases and can have damaging effects on children,” Osit explains. For example, in 2006, a Missouri teenager committed suicide after being the victim of a cruel cyber hoax.
   
Despite all the problems with this communications technology, Osit notes that it does have some benefits. In some ways, it helps teens conquer timidity when they’re very shy. “If practiced with proper monitoring, this technology can help improve kids’ social skills.”

Carol Daus is an award-winning contributor to OC Family magazine.

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