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Smart Mom

Virtual danger 5 ways to protect your child in cyber worlds By Maria BaileyPublished: November, 2008

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In preparation for an afternoon at the park, moms take several safety precautions with their children, from slathering sunscreen on their faces and holding their hands as they cross the street to offering the all-important “Don’t talk to strangers” reminder before their little one hits the swing set.     Given the degree of their protectiveness, it would seem surprising to some that these same mothers are allowing their children to spend time online in virtual worlds where they can interact with strangers, create new personal identities and share personal information. According to eMarketer, 34 percent of child Internet users in the U.S. will visit virtual worlds at least once a month in 2008, and that number is expected to double by 2011.     It’s clear that a mom’s lapse of protection in online playgrounds cannot be attributed to a lack of concern, but rather a lack of resources on navigating today’s online battlefields. And while the landscapes of our children’s playgrounds have certainly changed, one thing has remained constant: Moms need to apply the same care to keeping their children safe in virtual worlds as they do in keeping them safe in the real world. Here are five simple ways to protect your child in virtual playgrounds: 1. Determine the level of dialogue between players. The level and interactivity of conversation between players can vary between virtual worlds. Just as you would warn your child against speaking to strangers in a park, limiting the amount of conversation and the type of dialogue can protect your child from sharing too much personal information. Levels of communication range from pre-scripted conversations to fully free dialogue in which the child types in her own words. Ensure your child’s safety by knowing the levels of interactivity between members. 2. Select a site that engages moms, too. Many online virtual gaming sites have special sections or activities for moms. Preciousgirlsclub.com allows moms to send messages to their daughters via e-mail and computer screens inside the virtual world, and even provides offline mother/daughter activities. 3. Watch for hidden financial dangers. Some online playgrounds lure children into activities with free subscriptions and then, once the child is engaged, require a fee to be paid in order to continue play. Make sure you and your child understand what expenses lay ahead before engaging in registration and play. 4. Note sites that offer rewards, prizes and hidden treasures. Not every prize is a treasure in the eyes of the beholder, particularly if you are a mom. For example, bimbo.com allows players to purchase breast augmentations and other plastic surgery procedures as a prize for winning games. Make sure you approve of the treasures and motivations of the site your child is engaged in. 5. Select playgrounds that are supported by brands you trust. These days, it seems to be a marketing practice of companies to create virtual playgrounds to engage children in their brand. Naturally, these sites tend to reflect the values of the sponsoring brand. It’s extremely important to select sites sponsored by brands you trust, because you are entrusting them with your children. Smart Mom goes green Okay moms, you know the drill … We go to the mailbox each afternoon to find a stack of … junk! Aside from the occasional bill (most of us pay online, right?) or that rare party invitation, most of what we find is junk mail. While 44 percent of it is thrown away unopened, only half of it (22 percent) is recycled.     There are lots of ways to stop junk mail: Visit the Direct Marketing Association to have your name removed from various lists. Or, for a one-stop solution, check out green dimes.com. Greendimes guarantees to cut your junk mail by 90 percent in 90 days. The service is free; however, if you choose to become a premium member, Greendimes will plant five trees in your name. Reduce the junk mail you receive and save energy, natural resources, landfill space, tax dollars and a lot of your personal time! Solution of the Month: Grateful Garland This month, the Thanksgiving holiday shines a spotlight on all the ways we have been blessed. It’s also the perfect time to remind our children that thankfulness means being grateful for what we have. Here’s a way to make that intangible emotion tangible and give kids a visual aid for being grateful.     For the next month, give each family member a 5-inch strip of paper every night at dinner. Ask everyone to write down something that they are grateful for. Staple the ends of one strip of paper together and loop the rest through one after another to create a garland.      Make this a tradition by starting it on Thanksgiving each year, and by Christmas your family will have a beautiful garland to hang on the tree … and your kids will see how very much they have to be grateful for! Kidszui.com In our high-tech society, it has become the norm that children as young as age 3 are becoming proficient users of the computer. And as many of us have seen with our own children, once they pass a certain level of ability, some kids are no longer satisfied with CD-ROM games or narrow commercial Web sites.     Kids quickly become fluent in the language of the Internet, and between exposure from the media and their own friends, they know when their options have become limited. They want choices and the freedom to explore on their own, but as we know, the Internet is no place for kids to roam.      The founders of kidszui.com recognized the need for a more kid-friendly Internet that broadens choices rather than limits them. Kidszui is a revolutionary new kids’ browser that makes surfing the Internet fun and easy for kids from ages 3 to 12. Once you’ve downloaded the software, kids can access kidszui directly from the desktop, and parents receive weekly reports keeping them connected with their kids’ online activities.     The site contains content reviewed by teachers and parents, including over 800,000 Web sites, videos and pictures that are fun, safe and age-appropriate. Check it out for yourself, and give your child the gift of his very own Internet! Maria Bailey is a contributing writer and author of the best-selling book “Trillion-Dollar Moms.”

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