October's winner!

While I was away at a Mommy’s Day Out, my husband took the kids to LEGOLAND. The ticket agent asked, “How many?” and my 5-year-old replied, “Three tickets please. We have a wife, too, but she’s on vacation.” – Matthew, 5, of Las Flores

After eating way too much junk food at an Angels’ baseball game, our son became ill. Later, he asked me, “Mom, how come after I threw up at the Angels game, they just kept on playing?” –Jerry, 4, Costa Mesa

My daughter was telling me that when she grows up she would like to live on a farm. She plans to have six chickens, four lambs and 10 cows. “With all those cows, too bad you’re allergic to milk,” I commented. “Mama,” she said with exasperation, “They will be SOY cows, of course.” –Leila, 5, Tustin

After spending two weeks at the Ocean Institute camp, my daughter asked, “Who teaches the school of fish?” –Dayna, 6, Tustin Ranch

At lunch one day, my son was explaining to his friend that he wasn’t home to watch Super Saturday TV anymore because he now goes to kindergarten EVERY day! –Timmy, 5, of Newport Beach

While reading a bedtime book about birds, my daughter, Fiona, said, “Mom, birds lay eggs and people lay babies!” –Fiona, 4, Irvine

“Mom, could you please put away your cabbage and bunions? No one wants to see that!” (My very over-protective 7-year-old, commenting on my low-cut shirt. He meant “cleavage and bosoms.”) –Ryan, 7, Huntington Beach

When my daughter was age five, we were talking about Dad’s upcoming trip to the mountains. She asked, “Is Dad going to stay in the cabinets, like we did when we went to Mammoth?” –Amanda, now 7, Lake Forest

I took my son shopping and we passed by a nail salon. “Mommy, what are all those people doing?” he asked. I explained that people go there to get their nails done. At first he looked puzzled, then he beamed with a huge smile of understanding. “Oh! Because they don’t have nail clippers at home.” –Shane, 6, Irvine

I was in the park playing with my nephew, Brandon. We were running around, and then I told him, "Freeze!" Brandon replied, "But I'm not a popsicle." –Brandon, 3, Aliso Viejo

My son and I were watching TV, and someone said the word “stupid.” He looked at me and said, “That’s a bad word. We don’t repeat bad words.” I told him he was right. Then he replied, “Unless Mommy’s really frustrated, right Mommy?”
–Jacob, 3, Orange