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 I’ll always have fond memories of Independence Day as a kid. So with that in mind, we must ask: When is the right time to give kids more independence? How old does a young person need to be before you can leave her home alone or to babysit her younger siblings? There doesn’t seem to be a pat answer out there, so I asked my oldest daughter, Danielle, age 11, what age she thought was appropriate. “Never,” she said. “I don’t even like it when you’re out there mowing the lawn and I’m in the house by myself. It’s scary. I’m scared something is going to pop up at us.” Clearly, Danielle has been on the Haunted Mansion ride at Disneyland one too many times. Later, she admitted that maybe by the time she is 18, or in college, she’ll be ready for that independence. My hunch is that she will change her mind in a couple of years. Nonetheless, I thought I’d check with an expert, my friend Eric Nunez, a La Palma Police Department captain and the father of four children, to see what he thought. “This is a tricky one, law enforcement or not,” he says. “I can tell you, simply, it depends. There really isn't a law that states an age – like, say, 16 – when the state decides that your son or daughter is mature enough to drive a 4,000-pound piece of metal around town.” Nunez said there are many factors to determine whether kids are ready to go it alone, like what time of day it is, how long they will be alone, whether or not food is available that doesn’t require use of a stove or oven, and how mature and intelligent they are. “I have seen where latch-key kids at the age of 8 are pretty amazingly self-sufficient and have seen 12-year-olds who should never be left out of their parents’ sight,” Nunez adds. He provided a checklist for kids before they are left on their own: • They should be able to dial 911 and understand what an emergency is. • They should have a list of numbers and names of family and friends they can contact. • They need to be able to tell time and understand how long their parents will be gone. • They need to be able to get in touch with their parents in an emergency. • They should have a clear plan for screening incoming calls and how to handle knocks at the door from solicitors or unexpected visitors. “I personally wouldn't leave my child alone, other than when I run short errands, until the age of 10, and then the babysitting thing not until 12 or 13,” Nunez says. Now, if I can just convince Danielle that she’s ready, so we can have a built-in babysitter by next year. Happy Independence Day. Tony Dodero is a freelance journalist and communications professional. Read more at goaskyourdadblog.com. |
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