EVERYTHING
FOR YOUR FAMILY
First Years
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It’s finally here. The day you’ve been dreaming about for at least nine months, probably more. Home at last with a new baby tucked neatly in your arms. But are those butterflies in your stomach from excitement, or anxiety? Suddenly a series of “what ifs?” start rolling through your mind. That unmistakable sense of responsibility settles in, and you’re wondering how you’re going to make it through the night, let alone the next week. “It’s so true,” says BJ Thompson, program manager for KIDCARE, the 24-hour phone line at Children’s Hospital of Orange County. “When you first leave the hospital, you feel pretty secure, and then as soon as you get home you feel like everything you knew went right out the window.” Thompson and her team field all types of medically related calls from parents, but the ones that take the most time and tenderness are those involving brand-new parents, she says. Without the benefit of experience, new moms (and dads) often worry that they’re doing something wrong, and the situation can be twice as daunting when it happens after hours. Keeping a cool head and taking care of yourself as well as your new baby are the first steps toward making the transition to parenthood as smooth as possible. Here are a few tips to remember as you start out your first week as a new mom: 1. Plan ahead Even if you’re not the most organized person, there are a few simple things you can do before you have the baby that will make the first week at home a little easier. For example, ask your husband to take the week off work, or invite your mother or another relative to come help you. If you don’t need the extra help, you can always cancel, but having someone there will enable you to catch up on a little sleep during the day, and take your mind off the routine responsibilities of the house. Having someone to talk to (who talks back) can also help with those postpartum blues. When I had my first baby, my mom came to visit with a new cookbook and made dinner every night. At first it was hard getting her to put down the baby and go to the store for groceries, but her help and companionship were a priceless comfort. 2. Follow up with that first appointment Make sure that you schedule your meeting with a pediatrician as recommended, usually within the first few days after discharge. This appointment is important because the doctor can confirm that your baby is eating, urinating, and regaining birth weight as expected. (They usually lose about 7% of their birth weight, but should regain that amount within seven to 14 days.) It’s also a good opportunity for the doctor to determine if the baby has jaundice, a common malady among newborns. Equally important is the chance for you to voice any concerns that you may have about your baby. Come prepared with your own questions and don’t be afraid to ask them, even if you think they are trivial. Just asking them will put your mind at ease, says Thompson. 3. Consult a professional If you’re planning on breastfeeding your baby, be certain to get some professional advice while you’re at the hospital. While it may be a natural thing, breastfeeding does not always come naturally to many new moms. Most hospitals have a lactation consultant or experienced nurse who can visit you during your stay to point out little things that make a big difference, like positioning for you and the baby, or proper latching on. According to Thompson, most moms who give up nursing do so within the first two weeks, so if you have problems or questions during this time, make sure you work with a professional. Even if you have to hire one on your own after you leave the hospital, in my opinion it’s a great investment. I worked with one after my third baby, and not only did she help reacquaint me with the whole process, she was a great listener for a hormonally charged and frazzled new mom. If the budget is tight, contact La Leche League. The nonprofit offers assistance and support for breastfeeding moms throughout Southern California. (Check the phone book, or visit www.lalecheleaguescnv.org for a contact name in your area.) 4. Go with the flow All the books on parenting talked about feedings every three hours, so many dirty diapers per day, and a lot of other neat and tidy details. However, now that you’re home with baby, you’re finding that you can’t even keep track of time, let alone how many times you’ve fed your baby within the past 12 hours. Some babies are quiet and passive that first week (it can be a bit misleading,) while others start out in such a frenzied state it’s hard to believe they’ll ever be any different. But the one thing both types have in common is change. Do what you can to encourage sleeping during nighttime and awake time during the day, feed them as regularly as you can, but don’t stress out when things don’t keep on a schedule. I promised myself I would never advise another mom to “sleep when your baby sleeps,” because I know it was impossible for me to do. But I also remember hitting the wall after a few days when the adrenaline and excitement started to fade, and wishing I had tried harder. You have plenty of time to develop a routine with your baby but trying to do so too early can actually contribute to failure to thrive. Follow your baby’s clues towards a schedule, and it will be an easier transition for you both. 5. Pamper yourself as well as your baby A big part of making it through the first days and weeks of parenthood depends on how well mom takes care of herself. It’s stressful, fatigue sets in, and it’s just plain hard work being a new mom, she says. But scheduling a little personal time and even a night out with dad, can make a world of difference. “Everyone needs a break without feeling guilty,” says Thompson. “You’re going to be thinking about the baby the whole time anyway, but then when you come home your energy has been replenished.” Michele Piazzoni is a freelance writer and mother of three living in Folsom. |
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