Ever since Natalie Hagy was 3 years old, she has struggled with developmental-delay issues. So her parents were not surprised to find she needed academic help when she started first grade.
   
“It got to the point where Natalie didn’t want to go to school,” says her father, Doug. “We would see her falling asleep at the dinner table at 5:30 p.m. The schoolwork was so hard, and we were getting nowhere.”
   
Nicholas Connell was halfway through first grade when his parents realized he was having academic trouble. “When we’d read to him at home, he was memorizing words, rather than sounding them out,” recalls his mother, Deborah. “I didn’t know if he was a slow learner or just having problems.” After talking with his teacher and guidance counselor, the Connells decided to get their son help.

When is it time to call in a tutor?
There are a number of signs to look for in your children, says Kapil Mathur, center director for Mathnasium in both Ladera Ranch and San Clemente. “Retention and boredom are key signs. If your child is getting her homework done and achieving OK grades, then she probably is not getting everything out of school that she could.”
  
Mathur also advises parents to look for difficulty doing homework, poor test grades, multiple wrong answers, unfinished assignments and, of course, frustration, tears and decreased self-confidence.

Before finding a tutor, sit down and discuss the need with your child, Mathur says. “The main thing you want to do is let your child know that this is not a punishment. Tutoring will give him a chance to be involved in other things. It will give him time to play outside. He needs to know that he has not done anything wrong, this is not a punishment and that tutoring can be fun.”

Make learning rewarding
If a child is resistant to tutoring, how can parents convince her that it’s something she really needs?
   
“Positive re-enforcement. Help them build their confidence,” says Yagi Shah, owner and center director for The Tutoring Center in Mission Viejo and Laguna Hills. “Give incentives like, ‘Every time you get an A on a test, we will go get ice cream.’ Give them rewards.”
  
Even though the Hagys took a positive approach, Natalie was still a bit apprehensive. “I think she was concerned it was going to be like school, which she didn’t like,” Doug continues. But once she got there, she learned about the reward system. “It was a quick lesson for her: ‘If I do my work right, I get tokens.’”

Start looking!
Once you’ve talked it over with your child, try to get recommendations on where to find a good tutor. Talk with your child’s teacher, principal or guidance counselor, check with the Better Business Bureau, look in the Yellow Pages or go online. Other parents are a good resource, too. Next, check credentials to find the most qualified person. Look not only at degrees, but at experience and teaching style, too.

When the search has been narrowed to a few names, call or make an appointment to speak with the tutor to get a read on her personality and attitude. Is she upbeat and positive? Does she take the child’s learning style into account when tutoring?
  
With children’s extracurricular activities and parents’ work schedules dominating the clock, finding the right time for tutoring is always a struggle. There needs to be a lot of flexibility, so sessions should be held at a good time for the child and family – a time when the child learns best.

Progress, at last
The Hagys have seen positive changes in Natalie. “Before tutoring, she had low self-esteem,” recalls Doug. “Now she is incredibly self-confident. We’re not expecting her to be Einstein. We just want to give her what she needs to succeed.”
 
Denise Yearian is a contributing writer.


Where to look for a tutor
> Start with the child’s teacher, principal or guidance counselor
> Ask family, friends or co-workers
> Check with the Better Business Bureau
> Go online
> Look in the Yellow Pages
> Locate ads in local newspapers and magazines
 
Signs a child needs a tutor
> Doesn’t want to go to school
> Difficulty doing homework
> Gaps in learning
> Poor test grades
> Hiding test scores from parents
> Teacher reports missing assignments
> Unable to keep up
> Multiple wrong answers
> Unfinished assignments
> Frustration and tears
> A decrease in self-confidence
> Parents are frustrated, don’t know how to help

Questions to ask when choosing a tutor
> What ages do you tutor?
> Is it for remedial work only? Or do you do enrichment and maintenance, too?
> What subjects do you offer?
> Do you have summer programs?
> Can my child go during school hours?
> Do you offer diagnostic testing? Is it required?
> Do you teach in small group sessions or only one-on-one?
> Where does the tutoring take place?
> What qualifications do you or your teachers have?
> If my child has a personal problem with the tutor, can I get another one?
> How often is the child required to go?
> Can you work sessions around my family’s schedule?
> How often will I receive progress reports? Will they be written or verbal?
> What is the duration of the contract?
> How much do you charge?
> Are there any hidden fees?