EVERYTHING
FOR YOUR FAMILY
Cover Story
|
||||
|
Just a few weeks ago, Katie Henehan was sitting calm as calm can be while her mother talked with a neighbor. When crackers were offered to Katie's 2-year-old sister, guess whose eyes lit up? Katie turned around to face the neighbor and put out her hands in hopes of receiving some, too. Up until that time, her mother wasn't even sure if the 9-month-old really knew the meaning. Obviously, she did. "You could just see that she understood what 'cracker' meant," says her mother. "It was the first real word recognition that caught my attention." Gina Henehan of Huntington Beach had been able to understand her daughter's wants and needs long before this revelation. As a parent, Henehan quickly learned to read her baby's signals - the verbal, physical and emotional signs that help her understand what her infant is thinking and feeling. And according to experts, her ability to do this is the key to Katie's development. Although there has been a steady stream of scientific research targeted at better understanding the formative first 12 months of life, the most significant findings revolve around the simple relationship between parent and child. This relationship is the foundation for a baby's learning and a critical factor for everything an infant takes in and processes. In essence, a baby's perception of his world stems from the environment the parents create. "In overall terms of brain development, what we know from neuroscience research doesn't contradict what we've learned from education and psychology. Everything supports what we've been teaching all along about the importance of healthy environments, good nutrition and nurturing caregiving," says Sharon Greenip, a parent educator for the ZERO TO THREE organization. "The million-dollar question is, do we know what's going on inside their head?" Unfortunately, no one has that answer yet, but according to Greenip, we have several clues. Any parent or caregiver can uncover these clues by learning three important skills: reading and responding to their baby's signals, recognizing his or her temperament, and "gaffolding," or building on what your baby already knows. "These three things are incredibly helpful, too," says Greenip. "They can make parenting easier and more pleasant, and they can enhance the relationship between parent and baby." Read the signs Since babies can't use words, they have to reveal their needs through body language. They speak to parents and caregivers by tugging on an ear, tightening their hold, stretching out their arms, and in the beginning simply by crying. Understanding and responding to these signals creates a less stressful parenting situation and communicates to the baby that the parent understands her and her needs. Yet for new parents, the challenge of deciphering a baby's signals can be daunting. "I sometimes feel a little guilty when I see other parents struggling," says Heidi Heinbaugh, mother of 4-month-old Chaney. "But I feel like I understand Chaney based on what I know about when she most recently ate or slept." The Las Flores mother of three admits that she wasn't as confident with her first child. "I was always wondering what I should be doing, but with Chaney I feel like I know her needs based on her cry." Just as parents learn the difference between hungry and tired cries, babies gain more physical skills and start introducing new signals. Henehan says she knows when Katie's feeling tired because she starts kicking her legs, almost as though she's having a tantrum. Other infants may rub eyes, want cuddling, or pull on a lock of hair when they're running out of energy. It's simply a matter of dealing with nap time and bed time day after day that enables parents to zoom in on their own baby's specific way of saying it's time to sleep. "You're around them so much that you just start to know what they mean by every little thing they do, a cry, a body movement or even a smile," says Karen Wollangk of Lake Forest. Her 10-month-old son Jordan has a direct way of telling her he's hungry. He just stares at her with his mouth wide open. "And if I don't 'listen,' he'll start screaming," she chuckles. A recent national survey shows that many parents aren't as confident as these Orange County mothers. In fact, most reported feeling that they're not doing as good a job as their parents did. What's an expert's advice for these parents when it comes to learning how to read their baby's signals? "Your baby is a great teacher," says Linda Gilkerson of the Erickson Institute in Chicago. "The more peaceful time you can spend with your baby, the more they will reach out to you." Target their temperament Being able to "read" your baby is only part of the key to understanding her. Another large part of the puzzle, especially when it comes to behavior, has to do with a baby's style, or temperament. Experts agree that temperament is a matter of nature. It's not something that any amount of nurturing can change. In their book, "A Good Start in Life," (Joseph Henry Press 2002), Norbert and Elinore Herschkowitz outline the latest research about temperament studies, many of which suggest that particular characteristics of a baby's temperament may be linked to physical responses of the brain. For example, one study found that a person's sensitivity to sound may be due to greater sensitivity in the part of the brain that triggers the brain stem, while another study found that specific neurotransmitters may affect things like alertness, focused attention, impulse control, aggression, frustration and even moods. While this scientific information is enlightening, most importantly it supports the fact that parents who recognize their baby's individual style can better understand why they behave the way they do in certain situations. This allows one to modify parenting styles accordingly. Consider a few common characteristics of temperament such as adaptability, regularity, sensitivity and energy. "If you have a take-it-slow baby or a let's-go baby, that's important to know," says Greenip. A baby who really depends on a consistent schedule or a lot of predictability does well with routines, but not so well with last-minute changes. If Mom has to put off her afternoon nap so she can run an errand, there's a looming threat of meltdown. Whereas a baby who has a high adaptability style might accompany Mom on errands without a minute of fussiness, even falling asleep in the shopping cart as easily as she does in her own crib at home. Chaney is an example of a highly adaptable, go-with-the-flow kind of baby, says her mother. "We don't really have a routine or a schedule," she says, "and with her two brothers in preschool and other activities week, I really don't have that option." Wollangk's son Jordan, on the other hand, seems to have a high-energy temperament. The now 10-month-old doesn't sleep very much, says his mother. "He'll take a 15-minute nap and then wake up ready to go." Follow their lead Learning to read your baby's signals and understanding their temperament are probably the most challenging aspects of getting to better know your baby. "Gaffolding" may be where the fun starts. The term, a take on the word "scaffolding," essentially means adding on to the platform of knowledge your baby already has. As your baby develops physically and mentally, she becomes more curious about the world around her, and experts agree that the best way for her to learn about that world is through play. "Learning happens when you're having fun," says Greenip. She advises not to worry about flash cards in an effort to teach you baby colors. Just give him colorful plastic cups to play with in the bathtub, or point out the bright yellow bananas at the grocery store. When your baby is on the floor reaching for a toy, don't just give it to him. Instead, nudge it a little closer and give him just enough assistance to avoid frustration but at the same time peak his fascination. Helping your baby develop language is a key area where gaffolding comes into play. By late in the first year, your baby begins to associate specific words with their meaning, like Katie did with the word cracker. Studies have shown that babies whose parents and caregivers talk to them a lot develop a larger, more expressive vocabulary. The key is that the communication has to be interactive - even if you're the only one using words. While many of the children's programs on public television, for example, may be so-called educational, they are not interactive. You can follow your baby's interest in language and communication by reading to her, repeating words that she is trying to say and keeping a running dialogue during everyday activities like walks, baths and meals. Some parents even choose to introduce a simple, intuitive sign language to their babies when they are very young, which studies indicate actually improves a baby's ability to learn verbal language skills. Either way, during these activities you're helping your baby learn more and enhancing the communication between yourselves. Knowing what your baby is thinking and feeling, and why she behaves the way she does may be part science, but it's even more about the relationship you build with her. If you're still uncertain how well you understand your infant, just sit on the floor and play with them, advises Henehan. "There's always time to do the dishes later and eventually you will even get caught up on your sleep." Michele Piazzoni is a freelance writer and mother of three living in Folsom. She is a regular contributor to The Early Years and, in the Family News section, Getting Started...To reach her: mpiazzoni@hotmail.com. What to look for in Year 1 Babies are born learners and their brains and bodies develop at a tremendous rate during the first year to accommodate all the learning they must do. Even though there are so many milestones accomplished during this time, observant parents and caregivers often identify the exact moment when a baby grasps a new concept or skill. Here are a six key moments to look for in your baby's first 12 months. Just remember, every baby develops at her own pace. Relationships Bonding between mother and baby begins at birth and is proven to have a profound effect on an individual's ability to establish relationships later in life. Skin-to-skin contact through nursing, or simply holding and cuddling your baby, helps with bonding. By 6 months of age a baby may start showing signs of apprehension when Mom leaves. This is a common stage most babies go through called "stranger anxiety" and it usually subsides by one year. Vision Your baby's vision is slightly blurry and limited to a distance of about 12 inches at birth. Her eyes are reflexively drawn to high-contrast patterns. By 3 months, she can see more detail and distinguish between colors, and a few months later she can perceive objects in three-dimension. Don't worry about special mobiles or books or other decorations. A baby has everything she needs in her environment to develop her vision. Hearing Studies have proven that babies can hear while still in the womb. Shortly after birth they may already show a strong preference for their mother's voice. You can appeal to your baby's developing sense of hearing and language skills by using the high-pitched, highly intonated style of speech commonly called "motherese." It comes naturally to anyone speaking to a baby (not just moms), so chances are you're already doing it. Motor skills Your baby's motor skills develop from head to toe - literally. You'll notice at 2 months, for example, that she can start holding up her head. Rolling from back to tummy usually starts around 3 months, and by 6 months many babies can sit up unsupported. Crawling usually emerges around 9 months and by the end of the first year many babies start walking. To promote your baby's mastery of these physical milestones, give her plenty of baby-safe space to play around in. Fine motor skills should develop rapidly during the first year, too. What starts as uncontrolled swatting movements are building blocks for your baby's eventual ability to reach and grasp items at around 6 months of age. At 9 months, she may start picking up things with her thumb and forefinger and shortly after she should be able to show her enthusiasm by clapping. Stacking toys, soft balls, bath toys and eventually finger foods like frozen peas and carrots all provide good incentives for your baby to practice and enhance her fine motor skills. Language At birth, the only way your baby can communicate with you is through crying. Eventually you will learn to distinguish between hungry, tired or "I'm wet" cries. By 3 months, your baby may start cooing, followed by babbling at around 7 months. By 12 months, she should say "mama" or "dada" specifically, and perhaps even another word. To encourage your baby's language development, begin reading to her early on. Rhythmic, rhyming stories and poems are best. Routines and repetition Although it might take a little while to get a schedule started, eventually babies thrive on predictability when it comes to things like meals, naps, bathing and play time. You may have to adjust these routines as your baby develops, but at the same time try to monitor her response to any changes. The ages noted here are only averages. If you think your baby is delayed in one or more areas, consult your pediatrician. - By Michele Piazzoni Resources for parents www.zerotothree.org -- This website offers a multitude of information on brain development during the first three years of your baby's life. There are parenting tips, frequently asked questions and a tip of the week. www.brainconnection.com -- This commercial site provides accurate, timely information about the brain and brain research, including pieces on child development. Search for topics ranging from separation anxiety to bilingual education. All are presented in an informative and easy- to-read manner. "What's Going On In There? How the Brain and Mind Develop in the First Five Years of Life," LIse Eliot, Ph.D. (Bantam Books 1999) "A Good Start in Life: Understanding Your Child's Brain and Behavior," Norbert Herschkowitz, M.D., and Elinore Chapman Herschkowitz (Joseph Henry Press 2001) "Baby Minds: Brain-Building Games Your Baby Will Love," Linda Acredolo, Ph.D., and Susan Goodwyn, Ph.D (Bantam Books 2000) |
||||
RSS Subscribe
Digg This ArticleSEARCH THE SITE
