Most parents have read studies, earnest columns and blog posts about how important it is for their kids to have time for unstructured and unscheduled play.
Tykes, toddlers and tweens need to be free to let their little imaginations run wild, hopefully inspiring a future filled with fantastic opportunities. Or maybe six years of art school and a future leasing a cubicle in shared creative office space, or writing computer code for multinational tech companies.
But I digress.
Unfettered playtime sounds good in theory. But all that rampant creativity creates a mess, as in “Who’s going to clean that up?” Plus, I’m tired.
Many evenings I come home from work just wanting to decompress and have some quiet time with my friend, the television, and his buddy, a bottle of beer. But the kids have other plans. I hope my batting average for hitting the floor for some impromptu playtime is more than .500. I think it is, but as in all things fatherhood, I could do better.
On particularly hectic days, my wife, Elaina, may be on her last nerve by the time I get home. After hours spent with the kids, she needs a break, and she craves a bit of adult conversation. So there I am, caught in the middle between kids who want some creative attention, a partner who deserves uninterrupted focus from her fellow, and a group of professional athletes on TV who count on my support.
Kidding, of course. One of the best things about being a dad is having license to play and be silly.
But it’s apparent that play doesn’t come easily to some parents. I recently heard about an exchange between kindergarten moms whose daughters were friendly in class.
One mother inquired of the other about setting up a play date.
“Play?” the second mom responded quizzically. “We don’t ‘play.’ ”
How can parents who may not be experts in playfulness allow their children’s creativity to flourish?
One unexpected source of inspiration can be found in business tips for adults about how to run brainstorming meetings and otherwise develop creativity on their teams. These can be found in the form of podcasts, magazine articles and TED Talk-like speeches. Recently the Public Relations Society of America held a conference at the Hyatt Huntington Beach.
The most fun-loving talk we heard was “Creativity: Unleashing the Power of your Imagination,” by Todd Cooley. He had the conference room of adults laughing, singing and banging drums as he inspired fun and creativity in the PR people in the room. But what occurred to me is that his tips are perfect for parents too.
It’s a myth that creativity is an innate talent, Cooley said. The reality is that “creativity is a teachable, learnable skill that can be enhanced through practice and effort.”
His advice on how to inspire a productive brainstorming session is just as applicable to a creative party kids and parents might enjoy:
• Find a location where everyone is relaxed and undisturbed;
• Assemble a diverse group of participants;
• Create an atmosphere of fun, silliness and imagination;
• Be unafraid to appear foolish;
• Go for quantity of ideas;
• Suspend judgment about the quality of the ideas.
So how would this apply to a family brainstorming session? Imagine sitting around talking about what to do on a Saturday. Parents should encourage kids to come up with as many ideas as they can. Try not to evaluate or judge the ideas your kids come up with, and encourage siblings to refrain from critiquing each other, too (often difficult around our house). Encourage kids to come up with crazy ideas, including things they’ve never done before. Some may be impossible or impractical, but don’t point that out at this point.
In creativity, silliness is a plus. The focus of creative brainstorming should be on generating new ideas, not instant evaluation of them.
We enjoy word games in our house. Someone thinks of a Disney character, an animal or a U.S. state, and the rest take turns asking yes-or-no questions until someone figures it out.
I recently added a new one to the repertoire: guess a professional sports team mascot. “Is it an animal?” is the best first question we’ve found.
What can I say? Incorporating creative playtime with the kids while also watching sports is one of my best brainstorming ideas.
