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Kedric Francis with his three children. (Photo by Elaina Francis)
Kedric Francis with his three children. (Photo by Elaina Francis)
Kedric Francis

I see a lot of grumpy young dads when I’m out and about. Maybe they married too soon or think they did. And now they’re disengaged from the adoring families sitting right beside them, oblivious to their kids and spouses yearning for affection and positive attention.

It’s easy to recognize the signs and symptoms of a man who feels like he’s missing out. Luckily, I didn’t. Miss out, that is. My oats were well-sown, thank you, and now I’m thrilled to be a dad. Here are a few more reasons why old dads rule:

• We don’t have to compete to be the coolest guy in the room. I mean we are, usually. But we don’t have to prove it like too many young dads do. Basically, we’re comfortable in our own skin. Which is nice, because we often have more of it.

• We’re comfortable showing affection, and lots of it. Hugging, kissing, holding hands and letting our kids climb on us like monkeys: We’re fine with all of it. Too often I see younger dads out in public who seem to find it all so annoying.

• We have no desire to cheat. Sure, some nights we have no desire at all, but that’s between our pharmacists and us! But seriously, we’re too busy loving our lives to have a wandering eye (or at least to act on it), and we’ve been around long enough to see the destruction caused by acting on temptation. Honestly, the idea of all that duplicity is completely exhausting. It doesn’t hurt that the long and lingering gazes cast our direction have dwindled, too.

• Having young kids is a great excuse to act silly. “Ooh, he’s such a good dad,” observers say when I’m fully engaged playing with my kids. The fact is, fathering comes easily. Having been just about everywhere, now there’s nowhere I’d rather be.

• We don’t have as many friends and other distractions. Having been through a few generations of young and single friends who got married and were rarely heard from again, this old dad is fine with being on the other side of that equation.

• We don’t have to kill ourselves at work. Older dads have often advanced far enough in their careers to be able to call some of the shots. Take an hour off to go watch a gymnastics class my daughter is in? Done. Not that we’re all financially independent, but if we chose a less lucrative course in life, we’re OK with it. And we’re professional enough to manage our deadlines while still allowing for time with our family.

• We’re funny-looking. Hey, things change as we age. My face has lost a bit of elasticity, sure. But, all the better to make crazy faces.

• Our vices are under control. Late nights out carousing are a thing of the past. I want to be around to see the kids graduate and make a solid start in life. To do that, I have to pace myself. Living the high life isn’t part of that health plan.

• We don’t have to always be right. I mean we are, mostly, but we’ve learned to keep it to ourselves. You know that old saying, “Happy wife, happy life?” I’m betting an old dad coined it.

• We love being dads. I see many of you young fathers looking miserable, staring at your smartphones filled with pictures of your single friends behaving badly. You act like there’s almost anyplace you’d rather be than with your kids, and many things you’d rather be doing. Not us old dads. Unlike you youngsters, we know being a family man is the best gig we’ll ever get.

Contact the writer: kedric@coastmagazine.com